Sex Therapy

 Sex therapy is a unique form of talk therapy that incorporates principles of sexology and psychotherapy. Sexual difficulties can result from mental health challenges such as depression, anxiety, life stressors, medications, physical conditions and surgeries, relationship conflict, life transitions, trauma history, and misinformation or shame derived from early history.

 However, sexual problems can also cause some of these conditions, particularly, as they relate to mental health and relationship stability. The mind-body connection that inter-relates can be very strong. 

The field of sex therapy is very broad so sex therapists have to be well-schooled in areas of relationship counseling, mental health counseling, medical issues that impact intimacy, and, of course, sexual difficulties that may be challenging you and/or your relationship. Sex therapy can address all of these issues and I can help if you are struggling. I can address recent or long-term sexual difficulties, provide guidance in communication improvement, encourage sexual confidence, and strengthen your relationship.

In recent decades, non-traditional forms of relationship unions have emerged that are served under the umbrella of sex therapy as well. Society is becoming more accepting of alternate forms of sexual expression, sexual identity and genders, and inclusion of multiple members in relationship configurations such as seen in consensual nonmonogamy and polyamory. 

In the helping process, I may use a variety of approaches to help you manage issues related to intimacy, sex, and relationship challenges. These include cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), psychoeducation, mindfulness interventions, solution-focused brief therapies, sex-positive interventions, and relationship counseling, to name a few. 

One final note: It is important for you to know that sex therapy takes place only in my office, or private video sessions and does not entail any form of touch by me in the course of sex therapy service. 

 I am a gay male and am innately aware of the challenges that the LGBTQI+ community faces such as issues with acceptance, discrimination, homophobia, inadequate support systems, and lack of legal protections. Too often there are social stigmas that make it difficult for members of our community to feel valued, accepted, and safe.

Whether you are are experiencing open relationship or consensual nonmonogamy issues, coming out issues, sexual identity issues, support system challenges, or family issues, I can help you navigate the waters. My diverse life experience, common sense, and clinical history has provided wisdom which I bring to the therapy platform. I am dedicated to furthering and supporting our community through my dedication as a therapist and mutual community member. 

I am here to serve and look forward to working with you!

 Consensual nonmonogamy (CNM) is when two or more people are in a relationship and decide together that it is okay for each person to have other partners. CNM is based on honesty, trust, respect, and clear communication. All partners must agree to CNM and be comfortable with the arrangement.

Unlike polyamory, CNM does not always involve being emotionally and romantically involved with multiple partners but instead allows couples or individuals to explore their sexual needs outside of their primary relationship or partnership. CNM can be practiced in different forms such as swinging, open relationships, and polyfidelity.

 In contrast, polyamory involves having emotionally intimate relationships with more than one person and requires mutual trust between all partners. It is important to note that while there is overlap between the two terms, they are not interchangeable and emphasize different aspects of relationships.

 There are differences between counseling and psychotherapy. Counseling is generally short-term, focused on a specific problem in the present, and is a time during which you will receive education, support, advice, guidance, and learn new skills. The focus is on behavioral change rather than on the underlying causes of the behavior.

Psychotherapy is often longer and focuses on understanding and changing problematic and fundamental patterns of thinking, feeling, behaving, and how you relate to yourself and others. Many people wish to change but cannot seem to do so. Psychotherapy helps you overcome obstacles to change by examining and changing the root causes of your problems.

Both counseling and psychotherapy require a solid commitment to change, the willingness to tolerate some discomfort to get where you want to be, compassion for yourself and others, and a curiosity about how your mind works. Therapy is most effective when you put consistent effort toward self-reflection and change.

There are many professional associations relative to the varied clinical specialties. For those of us in the field of sexual health, The American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors, and Therapists (AASECT) provides professional and ethical

guidelines for clinical and educator practice. This credentialing body also governs the training and supervision criteria required for certification in the field.

 Connection! How are we relating to our partners, family, friends, place of work, life goals? So much can get in the way: how we communicate, our fears, our expectations, our agency in the functioning matters of life. Sometimes, when life isn’t working like we want, we are clueless how to proceed in moving forward and making the changes needed to change our circumstances. If we are in a confused state of mind, how are we going to function as successfully as we’d like? Are our behaviors going to be a reaction to our uncertainty or a thought-filled, objective behavior from reliable insight?

Our partners are, or should be, a solid and trusted foundation for our lives. We must be reciprocal in that foundation for our partners and deliver all that can further a healthy relationship. But, when things go awry, it is sometimes difficult to evaluate what went wrong? Is it me? Is it my partner? And, how do I find a way to rise above the issues?

I would love to help you sort through these very important matters that may be impeding your happiness as an individual and a partner to your significant other(s)!